Tony Farmer, a promising high school basketball star, was sentenced to three years in prison after pleading guilty to a number of felonious charges. The charges stemmed from Farmer attacking his ex-girlfriend after she wouldn’t reconcile with him, according to case files. This was apparently all caught on camera at the hotel where the attack occurred.
I’m sure by now you know where I’m going with this. Yes, he too is a Physical. Let’s see how.
1. He chased after the girlfriend that didn’t want to get back with him.
2. He became physically aggressive when she rejected him again.
3. He collapsed in court after hearing the verdict.
4. He cried and was very sorry for the things that he did.
So, why doesn’t this make him an Emotional? Because Emotionals internalize their feelings when rejected. They blame themselves and go into depression in most cases and will even harm themselves if the pain is intense enough. If not this they will hold on to the hurt and carry it into all the subsequent relationships to follow. Whereas the Physical seems to wear their emotions on their sleeves, the Emotional will come across as being cold or a prude or stuck up. These are all protective mechanisms…neither personality deals with rejection well, they just show it differently.
The Emotional would have never gone over to try and reconcile with someone that just rejected them. They’ll in fact walk away at the first sign that something is wrong. This could be that they’ll leave and never speak to you again or they’ll begin to shut down and you won’t recognize the person they’ve become. This again is a protective mechanism. You’ll recognize the Emotional by the Columbine or the last movie theatre shooting. These were intellectual people, how could they do such things? Because they internalized their emotions and then fell on their sword in an effort to escape the overload of the stress.
The Physical on the other hand is going to let you know how they feel, right away! They have a can’t take no for an answer attitude about life so they pursue whatever is rejecting them. They need to know why. It was said that Mr. Farmer was a really good guy and I believe that he is actually; most Physicals are. They’re the most giving, the most loving and caring people…until you reject or piss them off, then the uncontrollable emotional state takes over.
At the end of the day the Physical and the Emotional have to find balance within themselves to reach a greater sense of peace in their lives… oh and avoid prison terms.