Tony Farmer: Yet another promising athlete heads to prison

Tony Farmer, a promising high school basketball star, was sentenced to three years in prison after pleading guilty to a number of felonious charges.  The charges stemmed from Farmer attacking his ex-girlfriend after she wouldn’t reconcile with him, according to case files.  This was apparently all caught on  camera at the hotel where the attack occurred.

I’m sure by now you know where I’m going with this.  Yes, he too is a Physical.  Let’s see how.

1.  He chased after the girlfriend that didn’t want to get back with him.

2. He became physically aggressive when she rejected him again.

3. He collapsed in court after hearing the verdict.

4. He cried and was very sorry for the things that he did.

So, why doesn’t this make him an Emotional?  Because Emotionals internalize their feelings when rejected.  They blame themselves and go into depression in most cases and will even harm themselves if the pain is intense enough.  If not this they will hold on to the hurt and carry it into all the subsequent relationships to follow.  Whereas the Physical seems to wear their emotions on their sleeves, the Emotional will come across as being cold or a prude or stuck up.  These are all protective mechanisms…neither personality deals with rejection well, they just show it differently.

The Emotional would have never gone over to try and reconcile with someone that just rejected them.  They’ll in fact walk away at the first sign that something is wrong.  This could be that they’ll leave and never speak to you again or they’ll begin to shut down and you won’t recognize the person they’ve become.  This again is a protective mechanism.  You’ll recognize the Emotional by the Columbine or the last movie theatre shooting.  These were intellectual people, how could they do such things?  Because they internalized their emotions and then fell on their sword in an effort to escape the overload of the stress.

The Physical on the other hand is going to let you know how they feel, right away!  They have a can’t take no for an answer attitude about life so they pursue whatever is rejecting them.  They need to know why.  It was said that Mr. Farmer was a really good guy and I believe that he is actually; most Physicals are.  They’re the most giving, the most loving and caring people…until you reject or piss them off, then the uncontrollable emotional state takes over.

At the end of the day the Physical and the Emotional have to find balance within themselves to reach a greater sense of peace in their lives… oh and avoid prison terms.


4 responses to “Tony Farmer: Yet another promising athlete heads to prison

  1. Hey Dehypnotize, I have just seen the footage of Tony Farmer attacking his ex girlfriend. I am on board with your physical versus emotional argument however, I think that Mr Farmer is just a thug. How a grown man can beat a cowering woman and not know at the time that his actions are wrong is beyond me. What scares me is the casual acceptance of violence against women especially Black women. He is not sorry for attacking this woman, he is sorry that his stupidity and cowardice (only a coward attacks someone weaker than himself) has cost him his career.

    • Hey Sudelicious, thank you for reading and commenting. I could not agree with you more and in no way am I trying to excuse Mr. Farmer’s actions. However, his actions represent a very small fraction of the troubles that we face in our community. If it’s not attacking someone physically due to our emotions it’s verbal or cheating or hyper consumerism (I just made that word These are all ‘results’ not the causes of our actions. The cause is the same throughout…lack of control of our feelings or emotions. Clinical studies have shown that the logical part of the brain shuts down when our emotions take over… WE don’t out think ourselves. If we feel it we do it (When I say WE I’m speaking in general terms of course.) The bottom line is, look at our community as a whole and where we stand in society. It’s all due to this instinctive behavior. There’s a lot more to say to this but I try not to talk people to death…ha. I really do appreciate you reading and commenting and I hope that you continue to do so.

      • I can easily see that we could talk about this topic for a very long time. Being in control of ourselves is part of being an adult. There is this permissiveness in society where our feelings/emotions negate our responsibilities as adults. This is a very dangerous way of thinking. Men end up in prison and women end up hurt or dead. I will say that we celebrate self at the expense of empathy of others. We are capable of being aware how our actions impact others.

      • You speak the truth…more people need to know and hear this from all sides. I love that more of us are getting it, but we need more to get it at a faster rate!

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