Why Do Men Cheat?

Sigh…Well unlike all of the stories I’ve heard up to now there’s not one reason that anyone cheats.  However, the many reasons for cheating can be separated into two categories… you guessed it : Physical and Emotional.

Let me clarify these two behaviors quickly.  The Physical is generally known as the aggressor, the alpha male/female, whereas the Emotional is known for being the passive or the quiet one.  Unfortunately, it has been taught that being the physical is the ‘correct’ way to become successful in life…I wonder who perpetuated that idea.  I disagree.  The key to success is identifying and developing your strengths and applying them in the right place for the right purpose.

So, let’s start with the Emotional male/female.  The emotional personality comes across as shy, quiet, the cool one, a good listener or even sensitive.  The substructure of this behavior amounts to the lack of desire for confrontation creating the yes man/woman.  They are called emotionals because they put their emotions in front to protect their physical bodies; such as bashfulness, embarrassment or simply silence.  As it relates to sex, the emotional is normally waiting for the physical to make the move.  So, if you find that the two of you do a lot of waiting for the other to make the first move, you’re probably both emotionals. This causes a tremendous amount of issues in the bedroom.  The emotional needs to be warmed up first to have sex whereas the physical likes to jump right in feet first.  If the emotional feels that their needs are not being satisfied, they’re not going to ‘confront’ the physical about it, they’re typically going to tell a friend.  In the event that this friend is of the opposite sex, they’ll feel like someone actually listens to them and understands them.  Unfortunately, they’re probably talking to another emotional who agrees with them and gives advice against the physical.  This ultimately leads to affairs and the couple breaking up.

Now for the physical.  The physical is the light-hearted socialite that never meets a stranger.  They’re labeled physicals because their emotions are tied closely yo their physical actions.  Unlike the emotional, they can curse you out one minute and be your friend again in the next. They’re erroneously called emotionals most times because of their flamboyant expressions of their feelings.  They’re called go-getters, over-reactors, on the edge or quick-witted, bossy, short-tempered and all out physical.  This is why the emotional turns away and wont continue to fight or argue with them.  The physical mistakes this submission as a win, when in fact the emotional is internally making plans for revenge.When its time for the physical to have sex and the emotional turns them away, that doesn’t mean that the feeling went away.  So, what do they do?  They call up some friends head out to the bar and pick up another physical who likes to have sex as much as they do.  However, the physical will not typically choose another physical to be in a relationship with…unless there’s money involved.  That goes for both personalities actually.

So, at the end of the day, people cheat because of the lack of understanding what the other person needs in the relationship.  If you knew how to communicate properly with your mate…you can get anything from them that you ever dreamed of.  Now, this is not the end all be all of cheating but it is why most problems occur in the bedroom.

In closing, I’d like to stress that there is no right or wrong person in a relationship, there are only different ways of communicating our feelings.  Both parties have to be willing to see it from the other side.  Balance in a relationship comes from expressing your will their way or vice-versa.


You Might Be…

If you…

Are always cutting the other person off in an argument because they’re taking too long to get it out

Have been accused of being too emotional and cry even during commercials

Have been accused of always talking too loudly

Have been labeled as Bossy

Take forEver to get dressed because you have to be casket sharp before you step out

Are just very passionate but everyone thinks that you’re always mad

You might be a PHYSICAL

If you..

Are the one that’s always ‘acting funny’ and not expressing your feelings

Are the one that brings up things that happened ten years ago to prove your point in an argument today

Are normally the cool or ‘quiet one’ but later explodes for no reason

Are the first to say ‘ok, fine’ but don’t really mean ‘ok, fine’

Think that putting work before everything else is the best way to show your family that you care

Are quiet during an argument because you’re thinking of how you’re going to get the other person back

Could careless about how you dress because you feel the real you looks good on the inside

You might be an EMOTIONAL

If you find that you fit into both categories equally, you just might be crazy and you need to seek help immediately…lol (No..seriously)  Though each person’s level of these identifying characteristics varies, everyone falls into one of these two behaviors and should also fit a little into the other.  Don’t add too much weight to the labels physical and emotional; it’s more important to realize the effects of being either one.  Once you can identify the behavior types, you may then begin to assess how to best communicate with the other.  The physical and emotional speak different languages and unfortunately this is what attracts the two and causes the most issues.  Although it would seem that you’d want to be in a relationship with someone just like yourself, think about it.  Would you really?  No, you wouldn’t and I wouldn’t either.  Anyway, the point of all of this is to shed a little light on alllll of the relationship issues you have ever had and ever will; personal or business.

Ultimately these behaviors should be looked at  in a positive manner as they are merely our unique ways of communicating our thoughts and feelings.  We should do all that we can to learn to speak the language of the  person that we’re communicating with.  That alone is the key to effective communication…i.e. less drama!